Sure Sign You've Grown Up:
The continuing stock market fiasco actually give you heart
palpitations.
Why, oh why, didn't I sell my
Trib stock last week???
How, oh how, can my former company still be giving me The Big Screw?
And here's the kicker: The New York Stock Exchange site won't give me updated numbers!!! I can only presume other agitated, slightly more affected investors are also doing the moment-by-moment refresh on their browsers.
I am sooooo selling if this stock ever gets back up to 31! No heart attacks for me!
Office Space, Part 2
The Mad Farter now sits on the other side of the office..hurray!
My sympathies to his new office mates. I'm just glad I can breathe easier again.
Counting Down
It's snowing outside..
Soon I will be wearing shorts..
Vacation break can't come soon enough!
Why Celebrities Are Awesome
From the good folks at TMZ:
Daryl Hannah is at it again. The actress/activist was spotted running through the streets of Hollywood yesterday, waving a homemade white flag made of torn white sheets and a bamboo pole. Why?
There's no apparent reason for Daryl's banner performance, except, perhaps, that it was Tuesday.
Authorities were not notified.
Ah..Life
Office Space
There's a cloud hanging over my desk at my new office.
A blue cloud.
From the I-can't-make-this-stuff-up-even-if-I-tried files: There is a person who sits near my desk who farts. All the time. Gross, stinky, lingering farts. Farts so bad they peel paint off walls.
And the crime of it all? The culprit will drop his bomb and leave the room!
It's been happening for the past week now, almost always after lunch. The afternoon lull compounded with this disgusting addition makes the work-week close to unbearable!
At least I have a new red Swingline stapler to finish off the Office Space motif!
I'm thinking of bringing in a candle. Let's just hope I don't burn down the building.
Happy VD!
It's almost Valentine's Day!! I have pretty flowers!! Hurray!
Love and kisses!
Important Question
Can anyone tell me what the eff *Norbit* is supposed to be about? Because from those commercials I just can't figure it out!
Best Diet Ever!
Looking to lose 5 pesky pounds? I suggest food poisoning! I just three days time, you can lose the weight, and your taste for anything with flavor!
Happy dieting!
Global Warming: The Punxsutawney Phil Way!
Gobbler's Knob -- The forecast from this quaint town in the Northeast is a warm one. From the Groundhog himself:
El Nino has caused high winds, heavy snow, ice and freezing temperatures in the west.
Here in the East with much mild winter weather we have been blessed.
Global warming has caused a great debate.
This mild winter makes it seem just great.
On this Groundhog Day we think of one thing.
Will we have winter or will we have spring?
On Gobbler's Knob I see no shadow today.
I predict that early spring is on the way.
Who knew a rodent could rhyme?! Good ole Phil's forecast, along with the recent controversy about the government covering up findings that back up claims of global warming, got me thinking. Can we throw out decades of scientific research and just go off the findings taken every February Second?
Let's take a look!
1887 is the first recorded year of Punxsutawney Phil's prediction..and he saw his shadow. It was only three years later where he did not see his shadow.
From here, the recorded history is spotty, at best. The records become clear again in 1900, where Phil sees his shadow 34 years straight until his first clear day in 1934. There was a partial shadow-spotting in 1942, but the record-keepers blame the war, not global warming, for that shady prediction.
He sees no shadow again in 1950, and then, let the warming begin!
Between 1970 and 1999,
Punxsutawney Phil does not sees his shadow 8 TIMES!!! Before 1969, there are 3 confirmed cases where Phil did not see his shadow. After today's prediction, that makes 9 short winters in the past 28 years!
Punxsutawney Phil...winter forecaster...global warming predictor...
Al Gore would be so proud.
Mmm..
The best part of having a 9-5 job? Being awake when McDonald's is still serving breakfast!
